So I pick up this guy from an apartment and I can tell by the way he looks, that he is going to flirt. So he gets in and is like, “well this is a treat a woman driver.” I said "O I thought you were going to say an American" and laughed and he said, “well I thought you would have an accent, but you don't so that is good too.” So he starts right into his story..” Man I met this girl at the gym and she seemed to be feelin me, she told me she was gay, but I was like fuck it, when she invited me over. I go over there and she is like you want to watch me and my girlfriend have sex.” He was like “hell no, I don’t want to watch, I want to be a part of that shit!” so he and I laughed and he continued, “so she felt my dick and saw what I was workin with, so then the man one comes home.” I said, “the butch one?” and he said, “yea that is what she is called the butch one. “
He said, “she started flirtin with me harder then so did the female one, the female went outside and the butch one wanted to see my dick too, by the time the female came in the house the butch one was pullin up her pants, she was showin me her ass.” He said "actually the butch was was badder than the female one, she just wore boy clothes. So apparently the night before a female condom was found on the floor by the butch one so they were already having some issues. The female said something to the butch, all I know is that butch one smooched the female and they got to wreckin in the house".
So I said you should have stopped everything and been like "whoa, whoa, whoa, ladies, I will fuck both of yall! No need to fight, I mean both of ya'll can suck my dick, everybody calm down, there's enough of big daddy to go around". So he fell out laughin and said “you damn right, I should have said that, I am backed up too, shiiiiiiiit". So I laughed. He left me $20.00 on a $7.00 dollar ride.
I read about you on Mad Cabbie, be safe out there!
ReplyDeleteBeth.
Many years back, I picked up two guys and a girl in Foggy Bottom. I noticed that the girl was really gorgeous. If I get three or more, I usually pick up the mess in the front seat so one can sit there. They said that it was allright, all three would sit in the back. They asked me to take them to an apartment on Sixteenth St.
ReplyDeleteI got there, one of the guys and the girl got out; the guy who stayed told me to wait. I see the guy and the girl go to the door, the girl puts a key into the door, turns and the two kiss. He bounces back to the car, opens the door, sits down and closes the door. The two look at each other, the guy who stayed in the car says to the guy with the girl 'Now you've gotten rid of the fish, we can go have thome fun'. Then he turns to me and says 'Take uth to Fifty Thixth L Thoutheatht'.
I looked at the other guy and told him what a fish eyed son of a streetwalker he was. He asked me why I said that. I told him that a girl so beautiful was obviously wasted on him, but she probably was faithful to him. He wondered how I knew that. I told him that I just knew, but that he really should call her and tell her that he was a butt pirate and that this guy (me) was going to pick her up, take her out and treat her right. I even offered to pay for the call (this was before wireless telephones were prevalent). Sadly, he declined my offer. I took them to the Lost and Found, and they paid me well, despite my smart ass comments.