Monday, November 29, 2010

Long Leg Lola

So I pick up a lady at the metro station. When she got in the first thing she said was, "Wow women driving cabs now". I said "women got bills to", so she laughed and just started rambling, she said "you know there is a place where you don't have bills, and you can be with your family, you don' t have work or worry about money", so I interjected and said "is this place virtual". she was like "no it is called heaven".... first thought bible thumper. So I said "I see, you have to be dead to get there". So she rambled on and on about church, and then said can you take me to the gas station so I can get some cream soda. I said "sure".

Here is where things get strange. I pull up to the gas station, mind you I never got a good look at her. She said "I am leaving my stuff in the back, don't leave me, I don't want to walk, there are some crazies around here". I am sitting there waiting, and all of a sudden this lady pushes the the gas station door all rough and is moving swiftly in my direction, I am like WTF, she had a nappy bush pushed up (not picked), thick bifocals, and a long black trench coat that was bubbled up like the Michelin Man, she opened the door all hard, I thought she robbed the place, so I looked back all quick and said everything okay, and she said, "O yea, I got what I came for" (she stole that shit).

So I start off to her house and some how the conversation gets on pedophiles and you don't know who's doing what and telling me about her five children, (now I swear it was not me that lead her to this conversation, cause everyone that knows me, knows I think everybody is a pedophile or rapist, but this time it wasn't me). So we pull into the apartment complex and she hands me the Jehovah's witness literature, and paid me, then she opens the door steps out and says "they call me Long Leg Lola" in a sensual voice (with that hair and glasses). So I looked at her with a confused face and said okay (I am like why the hell is she telling me this), have a nice night and she closes the door..... I think she might have been a whore.

Friday, November 5, 2010

Random Facts

A man got in my car tonight, after he told me where he wanted to go he let me know that a womans mouth is the same as her vagnial lips, I just said "o yea", that was it there was no other conversation. I dropped him off and he paid me.